The Date (part 2)

Finally, because of the weather there weren’t much people here, lots of parking spaces available. However, Mr. Charming here decided to park somehow a block away from our destination, when there’s like a whole empty row of parking lots in front of the restaurant.

“You must be the type to actually love walking under the rain.” I mocked in an exaggerated gasped, surely he noticed that the rain isn’t going to stop any time soon. It’s a steady sideway drizzle just shy of a real downpour now, but no signs of stopping for real yet. But he shrugged off my comment and turned off the engine anyway. Still wearing the smile I’d seen. Ooh I noticed his dimples, almost-not-there dimples, if only he could wear that smile a little bit wider.

He turned to me and gave me his boyish grin a second before turning to the back, rummaging through his belongings before reappearing again with his dark navy blue umbrella. He handed me the umbrella and before I could even give a reply, he was gone, not like gone gone, but he was out of the car, already heading toward the restaurant. Uh-huh, give me the umbrella, leave me in the car while he makes a dash towards the building, such a gentleman he is, NOT.

I jumped out of the car, trying to keep up with him, I tried sharing the umbrella as well, straining to do so, I mean with his height and pace, he was  too fast! Hello? Darling dear? We’re on our way for ice cream and burgers, we’re not running late to catch any train or what so ever. It suddenly hit me that he might’ve been trying to avoid me, or was it something else? Fingers crossed it was something else, say like he has a phobia bout umbrellas or stuff like that.

So by the time we reached the block, he’s not soaked but still, wet is wet. He brushed the rain off himself, pfft not my fault, I tried. Just as I stepped beside him, I finally noticed our height difference, standing by his side, my eyes are actually leveled with his chest, I had to practically tilt my head straight upward if we were to talk this close. He held me by my elbow and ushered me in, it’s so cold right now that his sudden touch startled me because his hands were surprisingly warm.

We gave our orders, and guess what, my goofy retarded side of me decided to pop out, because the moment our orders are placed, I pulled out my purse like yeah you know me I don’t go on dates often (I don’t really know dating taboos) and I don’t really like people buying me food and stuff like that. So when I saw him doing the same. “Oh, you’re buying?” I asked, and when he’s actually paying. “You sure?” was the only thing I could muster next. Err no duh, he has a job, of course he will pay for the food, my heart did this little flutter kick of happiness, but then I mentally face palmed myself for giving such an embarrassing remark, why is it embarrassing you ask? Because I delivered my comment in a “You’re kidding right? You’re going to split it at our table later right?” way. Him smirking at me made me flushed red. Instead of just saying something simple and neat like “Thanks for the treat”, no-o-o I went for “I CANNOT believe you are buying me food, are you trying to make me owe you or something??” Double mental face palm, note to self if ever a guy is buying, he’s buying.

Alright so where were we, right to the second floor, sitting in the far corner, quite isolated, but not really much of a crowd to start with. I decided it was hard to sit face to face on our first date, so I sat diagonally with him. He didn’t seem to mind, on contraire he seems to enjoy the closeness as he shifted closer till our knees were actually touching. We chomped down our meal in silence and I was wondering what to say when Richard asked, “So how’s work at the store?”

“Boring but I’m glad I’m helping out,” I said without making eye contact.

“Uh-huh of course it is, so how about your studies? Applied anywhere?”

“Um the results aren’t out till August, there are some other places I applied, but haven’t heard any news yet.” I finished half my fist-sized burger, catching Richard who’s already on his last, he eats food with gusto, just my type of guy. I applied myself to my sundae. “So how’s work at your place?”

“Lots of projects coming up. Well you know the stuff, hell work for the next few months.” He held up his maraschino cherry from his sundae, “Want mine?”

I nodded and he put it on top of my sundae and smiled. I smiled back. “Why is it hell work?”

He made a face. “I’m going to meet lots more of clients, foreign clients as well. I’d be lucky if they’re like not picky or something, then there are the meetings, I might need to go overseas for the meetings, and basically I don’t think I would have the time to even sleep at all.”

I winced in sympathy. 

“Well there you see how tiresome having a job is, you should be grateful that you can relax and laze off for now.” He shrugged. I like the way his nose crinkled when he takes another big chomp on his last burger, how a strand of his pale blonde hair sort of fell over his broad forehead, and he had nice eyes, smiling eyes. And I caught those smiling eyes looking back at me, his eyebrows arched in questioning, I laughed an awkward laugh and he just grinned back at me.

“I like how you’re eating a whole burger and sundae to yourself.” He said, still eyeing me. “Some girls would be like, Oh, just a small fat-free-portion of ice cream in a cup, no burgers coz it’s fattening yada yada. But you’re all over that thing”

I laughed, startled and wondering if I should feel embarrassed. “I don’t really worry about what I eat when I’m hungry.”

“I like that.” Richard said, grinning. I don’t see it but I can practically feel his gaze lock on me, it made me fidgeted nervously throughout our meal, but honestly I don’t hate it.

So after our meal we made our way to a park (his choice of venue). But it was quiet there with empty cars parked around ours. But instead of taking a stroll which the starting heavy downpour forbids us to, it obviously cannot make up its mind whether to give us humans a slow drizzle or a heavy downpour, it kept shifting in between. Nevertheless we stayed inside. More talking, bout his job, bout my days at the store, bout our families. Time seems to fly at a much faster rate when you’re enjoying the moment, and soon enough it was almost five, my wonderful  dream date is about to come to an end. Cinderella has her curfew, I have mine too.

“It’s almost five” I sighed and he nodded. “Guess I’ll have to drop you back at the store” he said making a dramatically exaggerated long sigh.

“Awh, we can stay a little bit longer,” I smiled at him, something in me melted seeing him doing that. I’m missing him already. His smile, his pout, his dimples, but most of all his smiling eyes, I’m not sure when I’d have the chance to see him again. I can feel my stomach climbing its way into my throat as he flashed his sly sideway grin,

He chuckled abruptly and I averted my gaze again, it was getting a little embarrassing to be caught staring, again. Suddenly I felt his warm hands clasped my wrist, and I felt his calloused fingers, softly grazed through the back of my head to my cheeks, and before I knew it, I was pulled in his embrace, drawn to his lips. I managed a muffled disagreeing noise before he silenced me with his kiss. It was filled with hunger, full of lust, as if claiming what’s his, his hands snake its way from my back to my waist, to my shoulders, to my neck, pulling me closer, my heart somersaulted painfully in pleasurable way (bitter sweet thing), and I was out of breath as we finally broke free (I think I held my breath the entire kiss, pardon me for not being an expert on kissing), the kiss startled me, leaving lingering tingles on my lips and instantly when his lips left mine I buried myself in his chest (you know in case one kiss is not enough for him), I could practically feel my face heat flushed, my fingers traced my lips where Richard’s had just been. Then I felt it, his soft warm lips on top of my head, a soft chuckle followed, I could feel he breathe through my hair, his arms made its way around at the small of my back, pulling me in tighter. His arms were strong, and I surprisingly felt safe in the circle of them. 

I willed my reckless pulse to slow down and when it wasn't beating at an abnormal sonic pace any longer I tried pulling back, only to find his fingers on my chin when I was caught off guard and in seconds his mouth found mine again. But this time, it was much, much softer, slower, passionately, making our kisses linger (I figured he realized that I am not used to this kissing thing). He angled his head further, giving a long, extended kiss, holding me at the base of my jaw, this time I could feel his warm lips, I can breathe in his cologne, smelt of spice and a woodsy scent, I can taste his breath, peppermint and sugary sweet. Everything about the kiss was so surreal. And this time, I didn’t pull back (I surprised myself doing so), because everything about him is welcomingly warm, that I let everything else fall away, and let my heart whim over.

And damn it for the bad timing, my phone rang so suddenly, it startled the crap out of both of us, I practically jumped on my seat, moment gone. Hastily I punched the call button, it was Aunt Isle, demanding that I returned to the store ASAP, it was five minutes after five, talk about punctuality in getting off work. I slid a sideway glance his way and gave him an apologetic smile. He was looking right at me. Grinning, a big, stupid, self satisfied grin.

“What?” I asked noticing the tips of his mouth twitching, pulling the grin wider, his dimples sank deeper.

“What?” I challenged again when he just laughed, now realizing I myself had a crook smile on my face, his laugh was contagious and pretty soon I started cracking up as well, we both just laughed, easing the firing, passion building, make out session we just had. When we finally held our laughing mode at bay, he finally pulled his car out of the park.

“Now that should satisfy your wanderlust,” he said in between his lingering laughs as we made our way back to the store.

“What do you mean, wanderlust?”

He chuckled, “We won’t be meeting again for another lengthy period of time, I told you I’d have a lot of work piling up, and I can’t fly back and fro all the time.” He paused before adding, “So don’t you go find yourself another man.” He warned half jokingly.

“Oh, that. Yeah, that would be enough –  for the time being.” I joked. He laughed aloud and pulled my hand closer as he laced our fingers together, is it just me or this holding hand thing felt really good, I gave his arm a little pinch (which he returned with a sideway glance), okay not a dream, we just met, dated, and kissed. OMG we just kissed. This is not a dream, definitely not a dream.

“You are really the sweetest thing, you know that?” He said.

I shrugged, “Yeah I know, you were ‘sweet’ too back then”, and I shoved him playfully at his shoulder. He laughed and found my hands again, stroking his thumbs at the back of my hand.

“I meant you, you tasted sweet but you are also sweet in person,” He said in a matter-of-factly manner it left me speechless, was that a compliment? “I thought differently of you before, but now that I know you’re just that sweet little innocent girl, it made me – ” he paused, seeming to find the right words, “made me want  you more, made me want to protect you, to be by your side, day in day out, all the time.”

I gaped at him, surprised that he was capable of forming such, such cheesy romantic pickup line, my heart fluttered endlessly and I couldn’t even managed a reply. Should I reply to that? How do I actually reply to that? So in the spur of the moment, I chose silence. He shot me a sideway grin and drove on, silence.

As he pulled up in front of my store, my steps suddenly became heavy, I couldn’t willed myself to step out of the car, in a moment we would be apart for another lengthy period, I gave his face one last look, taking all of his features in, trying to make an imprint of him in my mind and heart, he did the same, always with the smiling eyes, we just sat there in silence, the charged silence between us speak volumes.

“You should go,” he finally broke the silence spell.

I shrugged, “Yeah” I said heavily. I gave him a quick hug, “You take care of yourself ‘kay?”

He pulled me closer to his embrace and planted a kiss on my forehead, “You too honey.”

Then I heard his soft murmurs, lips still on my forehead. “I love you.”

My eyes started becoming misty and I actually stifled back a tear when I heard what he said, it sounded truly sincere, making the whole date experience much, much more surreal. I nodded and then swiftly opened the door, got out, and waved him goodbye as he drove off.

Aunt Isle was already waiting at the store front, bag in hand ready to leave. And just as she took sight of me she trotted off towards the old block with the many rows of shops. But I’m too happy at the moment to even complain about that. And to be honest, everything around me practically danced in vibrant colors despite the rain, everything just seems to shine. I was all smiles until the next day. Talk about love drunk, ha-ha. Do I like him? Uh-huh no doubt, but do I love him? No the real question should’ve be will I come to love him? Only time will tell.

So there, that was my first and probably the last date I ever will have with him. Because just after that date, everything between us became distant, calls and text were getting rare, yeah I know at first I thought that it was his job and everything and I tried to be understanding. But bit by bit, his absence turned from hours to days, from days to weeks. And now he actually stopped wholly (had been two months since we last had an actual talk), no more calls and texts, no more news, it was as if he had disappeared from my life completely. I didn't want to move, didn’t want to do anything, but he was not there anymore. Tomorrow morning, even when I wake up, he would still be gone. He left me. I swear everything would hurt ten times worse if I’d actually loved him deep enough. And this boyfriend-left-me thing is becoming a pattern. *sighs*

What saddens me is that I actually hadn't had the chance to compliment him that he was a great kisser (I wasn't ready then but he just knew his way). 

Ha-ha, joke. I won’t ever give him the pleasure. Sayonara is sayonara. 

It's the Last that Counts here.

Yo, and no this ain’t the story about the date, that’ll be my on my next entry.

Let me just cut to the chase. UPU’s results are out on last Tuesday, and I – FAILED. There, I said it. Bummers, sounded so simple but the sheer impact of it just hits you like a wall. It seems that everything bad is all happening at the same time.

However number one on my list – I have no internet, NO INTERNET! In which my phone was broken as well. And since I am such the technology slave, it made me restless without. I’ll skip the how’s and why’s but it’s been longer than a whole week now, hell I wrote this post days ago only able to get it posted today, so ha lucky me I get to filtered out some unsuitable remarks, it was mostly my frustration talking so I am actually thankful I hadn’t had the internet for the last few days (only for the last few days, now – not so thankful).  If you’re reading this Rae, I apologized if my words were a little too harsh the other day, but seeing that you’re actually texting me, meeting me, as if nothing ever happened. I wondered sometimes whether this is the reason why we’d remain close friends for so long, me being too sarcastic sometimes to be oblivious, while you my dear Rae are too oblivious of sarcasm, well sometimes, your words can sometimes be much, much more badass than I could manage. But I’m thankful for that, ha-ha you know, in a good way. I still love you though.

Alright now I KNOW many of my friends (that includes you Rae) who DID pass and are accepted to enroll into U’s (with their respective choices and all), and are all happy and excited about it, I’m happy for you guys, seriously, congratulations. I am not jealous okay, well alright maybe a little but you still get my point, I am still glad for you guys, like yeah a whole new journey begins and yada yada yada. I know my disappointments sometimes get the best of me. But seriously? You see me being bitchy about all this and you accuse me of being a low sport. Whoa it actually impressed me when you speak of me like you know me.  But I’m not even gonna give you the pleasure by showing you my ‘displeasement’, if that’s even a word. I don’t know you well enough to even bother.

So let’s see, I aced my PMR and SPM, but everything turned south from there. I failed my SPA’s interview, my STPM is another downer, I failed my UKCG test, and now I failed in UPU. I applied for many job vacancies in between but still haven’t heard any news, they obviously don’t want me. Hmm listing all of my failures kind of makes me feel much, much and so-o-o-o much worse. I’m wondering if I was once a spoiled ungrateful successful brat in the past life, or maybe I committed huge sins so big that it brought the bad luck to this life. I’m also thinking that I’m destined to forever work my arse off on my family store, or to be married with some rich old dude my family approves of (please let it not be the latter, I’m just joking.)

So basically for the last few days, I was on one of my breaking-point-days, it all started with nosy acquaintances of mum asking me this and that about my future (it would be nice if they actually care, instead of comparing me with their sons and daughters, ouch) and then the results. What’s worse I have no one to vent all these crap to. *sighs* (currently cooing and cuddling myself with chocolates). Sounds like I’m whining here, so hmm let’s just move on people, but really, I am not that tough, especially on days like these. *sighs*.

And I am actually venting all these through blogging? Talk about loneliness. Have any of you ever felt true loneliness? The feeling of loneliness even when you’re in a middle of a crowd, there’s always people around you, yet you felt so distant from them. I’m feeling a lot of those lately, I can’t really put a finger on it, but I hate it.

 *double sighs*.

Okay this would be the last I’d be whining about all my failures, no more whining from here, gotta keep trying now don’t we.

Dear someone somewhere in the Peninsula, how are you? Hope you’re eating right, like I hope you'd quit eating fast foods every day, we both know your favorite so quit it, please? Eat lots of greens okay, you’re gonna end up dead sooner than you expect with all that crap you eat (hope I didn’t like jinx that). I missed talking to you. Hope to hear how you’re doing soon. Did you know your mum missed me? Does she ask you of me when you call her? Will you miss me then? She’s persistently asking of me, like why I hadn’t call her anymore, truth be told I never could call her again, I lost her number and you never  really gave it when I requested it, I honestly really, really missed her but what should I say even if I have the chance to call? Should I tell her? Something like “Um sorry to tell you but me and your son are no longer on talking basis now” or should I just tell her straight on that you’d left me and how utterly disappointing that is. I’m not sure whether I should feel happy or guilty that your mum is really fond of me. Why is it that I’m the one who actually felt guilty with all that had happened between us. *sighs* 

Hmm, anyway, you just take care alright, I think I’m okay with the whole sudden disappearance thing, yeah it was tough at first but I managed, thankfully. And it was from you I had actually learnt something, truly after so many never ending hurts, it all came back to me; I can never show my vulnerability at people, not anymore I will. I realized that I always had been showing my vulnerable side with people I trust, with the people I loved. Giving them the opportunity to actually use it against me, stepping me raw all over. I won’t allow it to happen anymore, if it meant keeping every little detail, every feeling, and every little secret to myself, then be it. I hope you go bald, you know. If everything you said, everything you promised turned out to be sugary lies. You being a lying jerk was the last I expected of you, not when I had known you since I was a kid, not when you were once my childhood crush, and definitively not when you always pointed out that I need to grow up. Yeah your actions were definitely very mature, disappearing on me, always playing the jealousy card, always with the you-listen-to-me attitude.  I cared, I honestly really did and I actually thought I did love you, but I really can’t get over the fact of what you did. *sighs* Just go bald, okay?

Whoa I just notice this, my first boyfriend left me around Christmas, my still-dear-in-my-heart left me around Valentine’s Day, and now the third left me around my Birthday. Hmm now that does seem like a pattern. Another sign of failure in this life? Oh wait that sounds like another whine, so let's stop.

 *sighs*.

Oh right, before I forgot,

To my dear, should I be honest? I am actually glad we didn’t like reconcile or something (for the time being, I hope, or maybe not, nah forget it). I know you may (or may not) hate me already, or maybe I’m just flattering myself thinking you still feel the same way as I do, ha-ha. You might be thinking that I’d friendzoned you or something. But no, truthfully I didn’t. You are still my dear, dearest. Even with the growing silence between us, I actually still care. I hope you’re doing fine. I won’t ask ‘how are you?’ or ‘how’s your day?’ something like that, I’m sure you won’t know how to answer that (for except answers like ‘I’m doing fine’) which I’m sure you are, I was actually thinking of asking things like ‘Did you missed me as much as I missed you?’ or maybe something like ‘What’s going really well at work right now?’. Anyway I hope working life is turning out better for you, it’ll get better when you get used to it; it might be hard at first, being in new places, new people, new environments and all. But I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it; you always do. So you just take care of yourself okay? Eat well, sleep well, stuff like that, wouldn’t want you to get sick again now don’t we. I really enjoyed our date few days ago, doesn’t really counts as the perfect date if all we’d been doing was eating, but I had fun, I thank you very much for that day. 

Okay and frankly speaking here, if we were to actually talk about kisses, it hit me; where does our relationship really stand? Because that’s obviously not a ‘just friends’ thing, but we’re not like lovers either, so it kind of sets the line between us, because if we were like a couple for real, I’d actually would be the first to take the initiative on our date few days ago, ha-ha. If I was your girlfriend then, then it won’t be weird if I hold your hand, or do hugs and kisses stuff like that, right? Right. I’m just saying. I really missed you, your soft smile, crook smile even, your exaggerated grin, your laugh! (definitely missed your laugh), your adorable chuckles whether timid or loud, your soft voice when you talk to me, and your sleepy groggy voice (Some days I am just so-o tempted to call you in the middle of night, just to talk to you, hear your voice; luckily my brain works harder than my heart so I’m able to hold it), bed ruffled face and hair, I remember touching your hair once, which was surprisingly soft! Hope I didn’t like creep you out with all that I noticed of you. I love your eyes, whether they’re cold or calculating or concentrating or suspicious or laughing or warm, like when you look at me. I missed all that. I can’t help how I am drawn to you, I have no definite explanation; when you’re in the room, I want to be by your side, and when you’re not, everything just felt sort of empty. (See, even saying all this, thinking about you had actually made me smile) *sniffles* Hope you’re doing great there, and if you’re already moving on or maybe have had somebody new, I’d be happy for you.

Uh seems like the waterworks is on the way, so I’ll just end my entry here.

P.s: I dare you to make me laugh.

P.p.s: the bald thing is a joke, I don’t curse (on occasions) ha-ha.

The Date. (part 1)

Hands clenched and unclenched, I rubbed my hands on my jeans, pacing around the store back and fro. I glanced at my watch, half an hour after two, tensions started building in, I gritted my teeth impatiently.

“Will you quite that and sit down already.” Aunt May suddenly chimed in.

“Teenagers, let ‘em be.” Aunt Isle commented, smirking.

“He’s late, he should be here hours ago, I hope he’s okay. Is traffic bad now?” I glanced another round of my watch, then stood at the store front, hoping to see his car turn in the corner, a fast glance upward. “Aunt May, it’s getting dark, do you think it’s goin’ to rain any time soon?”

“He’ll be here, just be patient okay.” Aunt May comforted. "By the way, of all the days I'd seen you, why on earth it is today you decided to wear and old T two size bigger, baggy jeans and a pair of old sneakers. What happened to your nice shirts, skinny jeans, skirts, flip flops and all that's nice and suitable to go on a date. Are you trying to leave him a bad impression on your first date?"

I checked myself at my reflection on the ten foot long aquarium, "Naa this is cool, I think, I'm comfortable wearing everything bigger, sneakers are cool too. Besides, I figured he might'd seen me worse than this when we're at your place Aunt May"

Just then my phone started singing the song ‘Team’ by a quirky teenage singer Lorde, making me jump on my feet, my heart pounded harder. I pulled my phone from my clutch registering the caller.

“It’s him!” I squeaked as I quickly hit the call button. I noticed Aunt May and Aunt Isle exchanging glances and smiled, “So refreshing to be young…” I heard Aunt Isle commented and her voice trailing off as my focus shifted back to the caller.

“Hey, hello? Where are you? Erm, are you here yet? Everything okay? Is it pouring there? You’re going to make it right?” I shot questions endlessly in a breath, my nervousness is taking over.

“Hey, I’m just around the corner, just parked. Yeap no sweat everything’s cool, drizzle, but I’ll be there” He managed to answer all my questions. “Are you waiting at the store?”

“Yeah. Hey, why don’t you drop for a lil’ while? Aunt May wanted to meet you, it’s been a long time since you met her right?”.

“Should I? You sure she’s okay? With us I mean, she knows we’re together, right?”

“I gave her the heads up weeks ago, and she’s cool, totally supportive.” I eyed Aunt May saying this and she responded with a smile, a proud-like smile.

“I don’t know.” He sounded tensed, I can imagine him scratching his head, embarrassed to make an entrance to come to my store, just to take me out on a quick date.

“Just come okay, I’ll wait here.” I said, no replies so I hung up. I turned to see smiling faces, teasing.

“He’s coming.” Aunt May repeated and I gave her my most likely a girl-going-on-a-date smile. She put a hand over her face, covering her eyes, "Oh stop, your happy glow, it's blinding." I laughed, it's nice to see her sincerely happy for me, for us.

“Oh goodie I can’t wait to see him in person, see if he’s good as May said.” Aunt Isle added. 

I mentally rolled my eyes, hope I didn’t did it like for real, ‘cause that will be so rude. In case you haven't noticed I’m not really fond of Aunt Isle, a little miss-know-it-all with a little miss-take-only-and-no-giving and a teeny weenie of miss-can’t-tell-when-to-stop-eating-people's-food kinda rubs you off in all the wrong places. But hey, I’m not alone, even Aunt May and my mom is in the club. Forgive me for I am not Saint like, I dislike people and I’m really bad at not showing them. So if I ever like never reply to you, say a question maybe, that pretty much tells you I dislike you and I’m keeping all the sarcasm and negative remarks to myself, you don’t want to go there. So instead of replying Aunt Isle with a sarcastic remark, I kept quiet, she’s still someone I should respect (no freaking duh).

Just then a tall figure with pale blonde hair walk right into the store in a hurried pace, the rain is pouring harder now. It took me seconds to realize who he was.

“Richard! It’s you, wha – when did you dyed your hair? Oh my God you’re wet, how far did you parked? Don’t you have an umbrella with you? You should’ve told me, I won’t make you come to the store, here wait I got a face towel here somewhere” Okay, guess you can catch on by now that I. Do. Not. Pause in my sentence when I’m nervous. (I secretly hate that, I can never be comfortable with him)

He gave a soft chuckle seeing me as I handed him the towel to dry himself, and gave a timid small smile at Aunt May when he noticed her. Right back at you pal. I was embarrassed now that he’s here in person, with me.

“You look great Richard, better than the last I’d seen you.” Aunt May gave a warm smile. Luckily Aunt Isle is quiet, eyeing my Richard, did I just say ‘my Richard’?, well I did, cause yeah he’s my boyfriend so yeah that makes him mine right? No? Naa just flow with it anyway.

“Well, Richard this is my aunt, mum’s cousin, Aunt Isle. Aunt Isle, Richard, in the flash.” I tried to hide the irritation in my tone,

Okay enough with empty talks, it’s already three so precious time are ticking, my so-called quick date would end by five, like you know I handle the store, store closes by five, plus giving my Aunt May the trouble for holding the store for me till then. So yeah, not a minute to lose people. What about Aunt Isle presence there you ask? Well it's because she works there, but not a really dependable employee if you ask me, so i can't leave her long.

I ushered Richard to the store front, trying to give the signal that I would want to spend some couple quality time with my Richard now, pretty please with sugar on top. Four months together, last met two years ago, and whoa it’s only today we've got the chance to meet. Bear with my eagerness people.

Aunt May seems to understand and gave a smile before dismissing us, or was it me dismissing us? Either way I’m glad, we made our way to his car, a dark Volvo.

“Yours?” I asked as I sat at the passenger seat, wiping myself dry from the rain.

“Naa I don’t have a car here, it’s my sis’s” He explained as I hand him the towel.

“Cool” was the only response I can come up with.

Crap now I feel so-o-o-o awkward, it’s just like the two of us, no teasing aunts no playful cousins around, we’ve known each other like since I was a kid, he was occasionally here for visits, that until he has a job overseas. Okay-y, my mind is practically spinning top fast trying to figure what to say. I hope he’s not as nervous as I am, I mean he’s twenty six, he shouldn’t be, right?

“Hungry?” I blurted, obviously not knowing what else to ask. “Yeah, have you eaten yet? Let’s grab some burgers, I know a place, and we can talk then.” I averted my gaze from him and stare dead in front.

“Sure, make sure it’s private though, not too many people” he said as he pulled in the gears and drove out from the parking lot. I noticed a smile on his face, was he happy to finally meet me? Or did he find it funny that I am obviously awkward to be alone with him, a tease smile maybe? I hate to admit but thinking about it makes me more paranoid. Secretly I prayed, Oh God Oh God puhhleaasee let me NOT make a fool of myself on my first date with him.

I gave him directions, and other than that. We didn’t talked. We. Did. Not. Talked! Like at all, silence, I could only hear the windshield wipers, moving back and fro, back and fro, the sound of heavy water droplets hitting our car. Man I seriously did not know what to say then, he looked so-o different from the last I met him. The hair obviously, but he looked cool with that pale blonde hair. Taller? Maybe, but I haven’t had the chance to eye him up to down yet, I emphasis the word ‘yet’ ‘cause I will, later, I hope. Oh please let us reach our burger place fast, I can-not stand the awkward silence.

Oops, guess the story ends here today folks, I'm kinda caught up with all the work and all the chores and all the other excuses you can help me think of. Story to be continued in my next entry.

P.s.: This date thing happened months ago, like March maybe? I'm just reliving it, in a more how you say it, a more narrative way.  So no silly ideas, it's all in the past, ima moving on. :)